Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Waiting to Exhale

I haven’t written in forever. Go figure – isn’t that a recurring theme? I don’t even know where to start. In no particular order:

Mr. Beans passed the bar!!! He took it in July and results were posted in September. I knew he’d pass and had no doubts. Even so, he wasn’t going to believe me until he had confirmation from the people who count. He was sworn-in in our fair capital city. Gallo and I were able to be there and witness the event. We went to KFC for dinner that night. Yes folks, the life of an attorney is as glamorous as you thought!

I didn’t mention it here but over Labor Day weekend, Mr. Beans had a job interview back on the coast. It went very well and he was tentatively offered a job, pending bar results. So, when he heard the good news, the compensation package for the job was offered and we accepted. The bad news: he had to start immediately. So, he headed south and Gallo and I remain here in Whitey McWhiteville. I’d like to say I miss my husband but the sad truth is that most days I don’t have time to miss him. Thankfully we have daycare that I love, but it now means that Gallo is there nearly 50 hours a week. That breaks my heart but we have no choice. I also hate that I’m completely drained on a daily basis. I get myself ready, then get him up and get him to daycare. (Thankfully they feed him breakfast.) Then when I get off work, I pick him up. We come home, have dinner, and then play in his room. He then gets a bath and it’s off to bed. I usually have cereal for dinner and crawl into bed. I’m just beat. I don’t know how single moms do it everyday. I just can’t keep this up and I’ve only been doing it for 3 weeks! My mother has offered to come help until we can be together again. I think I’m going to have to take her up on it.

In order for the family to be together, we need a place to live. Unfortunately, rent in the area is INSANE. It’s cheaper to buy than to rent. (Literally… not in “the long run” but literally, a mortgage for a decent house is less than rent on an apartment in a scary neighborhood with shaky plumbing. How sad.) Insurance is going to kill us (a 1500 sq ft home will run you about $4000 a year – insurance agents are the spawn of the devil.) So we looked at houses in various neighborhoods and managed to find one we really liked. Mr. Beans signed papers on an offer today! We should know by tomorrow whether or not they’ve accepted our offer. Keep your fingers crossed!

The final piece of the puzzle is that I needed to procure a transfer between state agencies. I have worked for the state for eight years. After the storm, I was able to transfer from one agency to another to be with Mr. Beans. The transfer was important because it allowed me to keep my personal and medical leave as well as not loose my retirement investment. Transfers are always the best. So, when he got the job back on the coast, I’d hoped I could transfer back to the agency where I started. I was told it wouldn’t be possible for a while thanks to budgetary issues. (I was told not to even try before the next fiscal year!) We had resigned ourselves that either we’d be apart until next summer or I’d just have to quit. Ditching the career is a sacrifice I’d make easily; loosing the benefits of insurance and retirement are a bit harder to swallow. We were trying to figure out another way. Monday night, the “other way” landed in our laps. It seems that two people resigned on Friday at my old agency. Even with the budget crunch, the agency MUST hire at least one person to fill the gap or risk being out of compliance with federal regulations. So, I made some phone calls, faxed my resume, and kept my fingers crossed. This afternoon I got a call that I have a phone interview tomorrow afternoon. (She’s making accommodations since I live so far away.) It’s the answer to prayers, if we were the praying type. If I could get this transfer, we could be together as a family by Thanksgiving. Hopefully, we’ll also be in our brand new house!

I’m taking deep breaths and telling myself it’s going to be okay. We’ve been through so much in our lives….. I’m always afraid the other shoe is going to drop… the bubble is going to burst… I’m hoping this time, I can finally just exhale.